The Mystic
by Wario the TableMan
Summary: Waddle Dee on an adventure


He reached deep into the hole and extracted the file. He opened it up and read of its contents. "It says that the love of pecans is an impurity to our nation," said the young Dee to his brethren.

Bandana Dee stepped forward, revealed his duly-noted toe and won the Olympics for the good of humani-Dee.

"Great achievement, brother," said Grandpa Dee with a kind hand resting upon his grandson's mighty shoulder.

"Aye, thank you, Grandfather," said Bandana Dee. He shoved in the tookwipe like a wonder-duker and slid off to the titanium fortress.

Bandana Dee knocked on the fortress's door and they opened. Marx stepped out in his high heel cowboy boots and smirked at his visitor's amazing pecs. "What brings you here, pardner?" asked the sly jester.

"Do not consume," said Bandana Dee. He removed Marx's lying tongue and replaced it with truth. Now was a fine life for all.

Magolor was there too. He took out his notebook and signed away his life savings to the orphanage. "They deserve it," said the moral studlord.

"Where are you, Magolor?" asked Marx's brother Mark, walking through the halls with a candlestick and a top hat.

Marx used his truth to afflict Mark with a great life. Mark gained angel wings and flew off to the Hotel California.

"Oh, hi Mark," said the Eagles to the brother of grape.

"Very nice to see you too, my fantastical bros," said Mark. He sat down and ate a cookie, a tough one with a long history for breaking little hearts like the one in me.

Meanwhile, Bandana Dee was hitting ducks with his best shot. He, Marx, and Magolor were on a duck hunt.

"Quack! Quack!" said the fat king of Dreamland. Yup, King Dedede, homedawg.

"Gosh, can you see his very fat tumtum?" asked Magolor rudely with no care for the obese. Magolor was very unkind to the less fortunate and should be punished for his vile actions. Marx pulled out the rifle and ended the madness.

Magolor's hands were wiped from existence, as was his wiping now.

"Now I cannot use a pencil and paper," said Magolor in realisation of his hand-lacking. "I must now type fanfiction by banging my forehead on the keyboard.

"You are egg," said Bandana Dee with a kind clasp of the kitty ears. He squeezed them with his muscular Waddle Dee fingers until they spurt confetti.

Marx giggled like a total bozo. "Oh, is it my birthday?"

"Shut up, buttface," said Bandana Dee. He then took of a nice and cut the Christmas ham. Everyone took a deep, loving bite of the succulent dish. Everyone was amazed by the righteousness of the flavour.

"How are you fellows?" asked Kirby with his gorgeous abs on full display from under his crop top.

Everyone sneered at the pink hunk and threw their salsa dishes at him. Kirby caught the dip in between his hot crevices and squeezed very hard until the leakage of peppers and tomatoes spewed forth like a volcano of condiment delight.

"I have seven women on my mind…" said Marx suddenly as he arose and placed a coin on the table.

"You are such a Fergy Fudgehog," said Magolor. He cracked a banana in two and divided it evenly between the three of them. He also gave one piece to Kirby and the other to the hunted Dedede.

"I wish I was an elk," said Dedede. The moon heard of his plea and granted the blue boy a really cool antler. He looked like Eliot, but was totes hotter than Boog, for sure.

"I'm hotblooded," said Kirby as he thought about Meta Knight's really neat tuchus. He imagined how to obtain sagely glutes himself. He tried push-ups, sit-ups, and plenty of juice.

Burning Leo and his brother Burning Bloo arrived at the scene of the crime and procured Kirby's juice. Burning Leo drank it while Burning Bloo died from starvation. They buried him inside a cow.

"Moo," said the mooing item.

"It is alive," observed Bandana Dee. He wiped the sweat from his brow and thought about inflamed tonsil extraction. He took out some pliers from the secret Waddle Dee compartment and handed them to Chef Kawasaki. "A little off the top, mate."

Kawasaki obeyed, but not before the Great Booty.

"Walking on the moon if forbidden, person," said Marx. He took a toe in each ear and became the next and greatest. Testing the waters with his brilliant mind, Marx made a world of pure goodness and grace. It was an ideal for all to behold. Certainly, we have all learned a thing or two.

"Eye half llournt nuh-feen," said Magolor in the sacred language of the scribes.

One scribed saw Magolor's speech and bowed down to him. "You are my idol now."

"Nope," said Magolor and he took out his rifle. The scribe scribed his last and this impressed the Paint Roller.

"Hello," said Meta Knight, mentioning his fine behind.

Kirby was filled with ire, fire, and squire. He knelt on a toothpick and made many a zebra lash.

"Marty, Melman, and Gloria!" cried Alex the Lion, roaring with intense passion as he drew his flaming sword and destroyed the latest issue of Nerd Monthly.

"Walk not," said King Dedede. He took a good look at his stamp collection. "Well, boy howdy!"

Kirby glanced over at King Dedede's fortuitous abs. "You did well, my son." And with that, Kirby unveiled his inner spirit and clung to Dedede with the deep reassurance of compassion and brotherhood. Dedede looked at his arm and noticed the brilliant tattoo he had been bestowed. Now he was a Superstah Warrior.

**THE END**


End file.
